So…sorry my auction update is this late. Let me fill you in…
Even I was getting excited, ME the romantic-turned-skeptic-borderline-cynic who couldn’t care less if the guy of my dreams showed up that night or not. Still, the night seemed to promise possibilities that even I was open to…
Well, turns out Mother Nature had other plans.
Talk about a DAMPER – the worst rainstorm in months, and the weather guys warning about a tornado (people in Hampton Roads never learn- don’t listen to the weather guys!). Nineteen of the 20 Singles showed up, my Dominion Derby Girls (and guy) showed up, a small crowd came – but where were the guys who sent odd or otherwise questionable messages post-magazine release?
Definitely not at the Granby Theater. When the MC asked all the single guys in the audience to raise their hands, I think I saw 5 hands. FIVE GUYS, some of them there to support a friend, and 10 girls onstage. You do the math!
Now, don’t get me wrong. Everyone got many bids, and I myself (as long as we’re deflecting any misconceptions here) got bid on by 4 guys. The one who ended up winning seems like a very nice guy, but he also bid on and won a fellow Single. So, while I’m happy I wasn’t won by the guy who looked old enough to have reared me, I don’t know if I should be beside myself with flattery.
I’d love to blame Mother Nature – she really made it difficult for all the 100+ people who RSVP’ed to show up. Still, then we look at the flip side: the men.
Somehow, despite the downpour, the women showed up in droves. Half the guys went for over $200 each, and you could tell some of the girls were giving it their best shot to win one of the guys as a date. (I think I can even use the word clamor here.) I won’t list the amounts the women went for, but it wasn’t a becoming comparison.
So, I reiterate – where were you, all you guys who sent me messages or emails? I got a ridiculous message the day after the auction—some guy said he’d seen my profile in Hampton Roads Magazine and wanted to know if I’d had any luck. Thanks, lazy ass…you could have just shown up and seen for yourself!
Guys, it doesn’t get easier than this. Ten very successful and, if I do say so myself, desirable women let it be known EXACTLY what they do for a living, where they live, their hobbies, what they find attractive – and some of you may have put your feelers out, but when we didn’t swoon at your somewhat awkward and questionable openers, you didn’t come to the auction!
On the upside, apparently some guy told one of my derby gals that I had the best legs of all the Singles. So, readers, now you know!
Guys, how well do you have to know someone before you’re willing to put in some effort? You know, put a little fight into it. Do women just want it more? Should we blame Mother Nature or your human nature?